What Does the Word Woman Mean? And the Survey Says........!

What does the word Woman mean? Queen Kong Mother F**ker!

What does it mean to be a Woman?

And the Survey Says……!

Woman – definition – noun – “an adult female person.”

Man – definition – noun – “an individual human or adult male human."

We aren’t even designated as an “individual human” status? WTF??

I am a big fan of women! I am a woman! I talk a lot about being a woman in my book and blogs. I write a lot about being a menopausal woman. I wrote blogs about my mother, my sister/best friend, my local community/women’s group, etc. I have spent 66 years trying to define myself – as a woman – and as an “individual human being.” Finding purpose and self-worth is an ongoing project. I needed a little help from my female compatriots to see what they thought about: What does the word WOMAN mean?  

She says with gritted teeth!!

I decided this blog needed to be about womanhood and its meaning to the female faction - especially in our current environment. I’m personally struggling about this topic and our place in the universe. Half the world is female. So why am I struggling? Why are we so marginalized? We are not irrelevant, insignificant or powerless! It is time for some sisterhood affirmation ladies (and gentlemen)!

I took a small survey of 20 women – ages 30 thru 86, different geographical regions in the US, with and without children, single or married, employed, stay at home mother, retired, different financial brackets, different careers, etc. I’m still waiting for some reply’s because I selected this diverse group of women for a reason. Also, maybe some don’t want to answer my survey. (Disclaimer: Those who have taken this survey will remain anonymous for privacy reasons!!)

I also asked a second question involving personalized “pet peeves.” 

To start this conversation – I’m going to quote a famous monologue from a recent popular movie: 

“It is literally impossible to be a woman,” Gloria tells Barbie. “You are so beautiful, and so smart, and it kills me that you don’t think you’re good enough. Like, we have to always be extraordinary, but somehow, we’re always doing it wrong.

You have to be thin, but not too thin. And you can never say you want to be thin. You have to say you want to be healthy, but also you have to be thin. You have to have money, but you can’t ask for money because that’s crass. You have to be a boss, but you can’t be mean. You have to lead but you can’t squash other people’s ideas. You’re supposed to love being a mother, but don’t talk about your kids all the damn time. You have to be a career woman, but also always be looking out for other people. You have to answer for men’s bad behavior, which is insane, but if you point that out, you’re accused of complaining.

You’re supposed to stay pretty for men, but not so pretty that you tempt them too much or that you threaten other women because you’re supposed to be a part of the sisterhood. But always stand out and always be grateful. But never forget that the system is rigged. So, find a way to acknowledge that but also always be grateful. You have to never get old, never be rude, never show off, never be selfish, never fall down, never fail, never show fear, never get out of line. It’s too hard! It’s too contradictory and nobody gives you a medal or says thank you! And it turns out in fact that not only are you doing everything wrong, but also everything is your fault.

I’m just so tired of watching myself and every single other woman tie herself into knots so that people will like us,” Gloria concludes. ”And if all of that is also true for a doll just representing women, then I don’t even know.” Quote by America Ferrera from the movie “Barbie”

BTW – I think I’m Weird Barbie!”

I enjoyed this movie, especially because it conveyed a message of women supporting woman power amidst all our struggles – even though this 65-year-old doll denoted the perfect body that we should aspire to and a cliched, sexualized toy for impressionable young girls! Millions of little girls dressed in pink and dragged their mommies to this movie. I hope they got the message and hold onto it throughout their lives. Of course, they never made a Barbie that looked like me!!! Mattel should make a “Menopausal Barbie” – sweating, tired, confused, angry, tearful, wrinkled and sagging. I would buy that doll!!!

Below are the two questions I asked the ladies:

1.     What word/words pop in your head when you hear or think of the word “Woman”?

2.     What are your Top 2 Pet Peeves about being a woman?

I asked these specific questions – because the answers to Question 1 are antithetical/contrary to the Question 2 answers. I’ll go through each person’s response and give my unsolicited commentary – so this will not be a short blog – too near and dear a topic for my cold black heart!

1st Respondent:

1 - nurturer

2 – a. being taken less seriously than men

b. not being appreciated for their contributions to society

The word “nurturer” is repeated in the responses below and an apt word for – woman. Whether we procreate or not – we are genetically predisposed to nurture. We support, educate, encourage, nourish, mentor and advocate for others. Women are natural caregivers. We often don’t get credit for nurturing, but most don’t expect it. The problem being - the nurturer – often it’s not repaid in kind. The give and take are not always mutual but often mutually exclusive. 

Hence, we look at her two pet peeves. “Being taken less seriously then men” is an ongoing battle (of the sexes). Work example: I know I can be frivolous and wacky, but it has nothing and everything to do with my work ethos. I am equally OCD about my work ethic as in my home. But being silly and funny on occasion brings levity to a droll, boring, robotic routine. I can’t sustain my sense of self in those kind of environments – so I broke the rules and paid dearly for it. A perfect example was near the end of my 21 years at my last job. I was talking to a client on the phone who I adored and is hilarious. She made me laugh out loud and my boss came flying around the corner and yelled, “No more laughing, no more fun!!! Get back to work!” I was shocked and the client heard his screeching bile. She replied to me, “Tell him to mind his own business!" (only with saltier language) I said to my rude boss, “I am talking to (name here).” He tried to cover his massive peevish faux pas and pretended he was joking – but he wasn’t – and both of us knew it. Every time I laughed from that point on – he screamed those words. So, I quit. Needless to say, no one should be treated this way. I was rarely taken seriously and always a second-class citizen in that toxic climate. The word misogynist fits this pet peeve response and many others. 

What have women done to deserve this marginalized status? I’m surrounded by educated, intelligent, smart, talented, kind, funny women who deserve to be listened to and acknowledged. The world should hear their voices. We have come to expect men of a certain ilk to treat us less seriously – but surprised and dismayed when another woman does it. Shocks me every time! It could also be your children, family, friends, partner, co-workers, community or even the salesclerk that treats you as if you are invisible. Are these types of people so weak, jealous and insecure that we threaten their tender sensibilities and their position of imagined “power?”  We live on such a glorious planet but forced to participate in the “Squid Game” on a daily basis. I think I speak for a lot of women when I say, “I’m tired of this s**t! I deserve to be seen and heard!”

So, the second pet peeve, “not being appreciated for their contributions to society” goes hand in hand with the first peeve. If you aren’t taken seriously, then you apparently haven’t contributed. I think most people just want acknowledgement and recognition for achievements that are praiseworthy. Getting out of bed for some is an achievement – raising and nurturing children – running a department – saving lives – etc. etc. We all deserve a pat on the back and a simple, “Thank you!” every now and then. Mothers don’t even get paid or have time off!!! 

2nd Respondent:

1 – my Mom

2 – a. the need to say “sorry.

b. cramps

You deserve a little Wo-menoplause!!!

Yes, moms are the epitome of womanhood. They are, after all, the human being who nurtured, struggled and carried us in their wombs for approximately 9 months – while still working and doing all the many tasks expected of them. Then they painfully, laboriously and with copious amounts of blood, fluids, screams and cursing - squeezed us out. Then they raised us, cleaned our poopy bottoms, wiped our tears, kissed our boo-boos, attended every school event, fed us, bathed us, clothed us, received our complaints and anger with kindness, applauded our growth and achievements, cleaned up our messes, assisted us in leaving the nest while they silently wept – often alone or with minimal assistance – only to be taken less seriously and with no recognition for this momentous accomplishment. This may be harsh – but I’m pretty sure I didn’t thank my mother very often unless it was in response to her fulfilling one of my many demands. Moms are the unsung heroes of this world. Giving birth is a miracle, extremely brave and unlimited self-sacrifice – yet they are not truly recognized or seen for this heroism. They deserve a medal of honor! Women are goddesses and deserve that status – for giving us life!

When I read the pet peeve, “the need to say “sorry”, I wept. This is definitely a woman thing. While working I attempted to count how many times I said, “I’m sorry,” in a day – but lost count by mid-morning. I’m better than I used to be, but for decades felt I needed to apologize for existing. It makes me ill. We must learn to apologize only when absolutely necessary – like accidentally bumping into someone, if you were mean to someone unnecessarily, didn’t tell your mom how much you appreciated them, loudly farted in public, inadvertently hip-bumped your boss into an empty elevator shaft, etc. Basic etiquette. You should not be apologizing for breathing. But I know a lot of women who say “sorry” just to tame a situation, or because they’ve been demoralized so much that it’s an automatic response, or you feel invisible which qualifies as repentant when noticed. All young females need to be given a vaccine for the “sorry virus.” I know that women say this phrase more than men. Next time someone has an imaginary grievance that you have caused, don’t say, “I’m sorry…”, say, “Are you having a bad day? Do you need to talk?” I say this because 9 out of 10 times – that person is just sad, hurt and angry at something unrelated to your situation and needs some affirmation, a nappy or a hug. 

We are cursed with periods twice. Getting them and losing them!

The other pet peeve “cramps” is (and was) a woman’s burden to bear and highly unpleasant. It incapacitates a lot of women – but once again – society expects you to buck up and carry on. Mine were bad and my sisters were worse – so I agree and sympathize with this pet peeve - uncomfortable female affliction. It isn't considered an illness - so businesses don't consider "periods" as a reason to miss work (just like Menopause). It does eventually end but then you begin “The Menopause.” I will now say, “I’m sorry,” for reminding you of this eventual trauma. BTW – only women can handle menses and menopause – a man would be whining and mewling in a corner, curled up in a ball of cramps and crying for their Mommy! A man wouldn’t survive it!

3rd Respondent:

1 – badass, community, periods, underappreciated, collective, pantsuits

2 – a. when men tell me to smile

b. when men assume I can’t do something smart/lift something heavy, etc.

I love all the chosen words describing the word “woman.” We are or have the potential to be “Badass!” Women in my lifetime that come to mind are - Bette Davis in “All About Eve,” "Thelma and Louise" from the same named movie and Ruth Bader Ginsburg – a real life supreme Badass!!! These women made me feel powerful and hopeful. “Community and Collective” are synonymous with nurture – because we instinctively support, bond and emotionally/physically hold up our sisters/community – it takes a village. We nourish each other and with that sustenance we can endure. I’m forever grateful and humbled by my symbiotic collective of female power. As before, under-appreciated is a consistent theme in this survey. We take 5 steps forward and 8 steps back – an ongoing marathon for womankind! 

“When men tell me to smile.” How many women have heard this passive aggressive, insulting statement, “You’ll look prettier if you smile.” I’ve also had a man say this to me and my immediate reaction was to punch him in the face. However, that is frowned upon, so I said, “You’d be prettier if you shut up.” Give us something to smile about assholes!

The next peeve about – “when men assume I can’t do something smart/lift something heavy, etc.” – is a common grievance amongst women. I’ve written about this in my primate blogs. It drives women crazy – unless your Blanche Dubois. “I’ve always depended on the kindness of strangers” and “I don’t want realism….” and “I can’t stand a naked lightbulb” are a couple famous lines in “A Streetcar Named Desire.” Women have evolved into Amazons in our micro-universes. We are self-sufficient, capable, smart – and have the ability to figure out and solve complex problems. Then why are men making assumptions that we can’t? I know some men (my husband) who just want to help. However, we have all experienced those men who treat us as if we are idiots and weak. F**k ‘em!!

You don't have to smile and wear a pantsuit to be powerful. Work that runway of life Beeyatch!

”Pantsuits” response killed me!! She’s right – women invented the pantsuit to compete with men. These came about in the 60s because more women were joining the workforce and needed to contend with the "male power suit” in a male-dominated environment. Plus, pantsuits looked BadAss!! In the 21st century - we no longer need pantsuits to prove we are equally powerful!

4th Respondent:

1 – lots of power and NO Power

2 – a. I have to wear a bra everyday

b. I am responsible to have food in the house and on the table – that’s my biggest pet peeve in my home

Great response – we have “lots of power and NO Power.” I’ve mentioned in my Primates Blog that women are powerful because we have what men want. Yes, Boobs and Sex! There are a lot of powerful women in business, societal status, government, icons – mothers. But somehow this power has limitations as a result of being female – hence “No Power.” Is there a solution or answer to this conundrum? We could get rid of all the old, rich, fat, white men or form the world’s biggest coven and hex everyone to their senses or we continue on with our communal mission of educating our children to be better people. The invisible threads of a nurturing collective will reap the positive intended results.

Bras are harmful to our health and back!

“Wearing a bra everyday” is a spot on nuisance!!! As the day wears on, it becomes a torture device – just like the girdles of yore! Women’s undergarments have been the inventions of sadists for generations. It’s gotten better over the decades, but these contraptions still inflict harm – body and soul. Society frowns upon free, flopping, screaming nipples - boobs left to their own devices. Also, men couldn’t get anything done if we set these bouncing bosoms loose! But who cares about what men wish for! I think a “bra” should be invented to contain their wobbly bits and see how they like it!! Constraining, chafing, sweaty balls!!! I groan every night when I release my boobsey twins! They flop with Joy!!

“Responsible to have food in the house and on the table” has always been relegated to the female. I don’t have kids and lucky to have a husband who likes to cook and is good at it – but I am not the norm. After the grueling day most women endure – they are still expected to grocery shop, make a three-course meal in seconds that pleases everyone, set the table, serve, hear complaints and then clean up. WTF!!! I’ve trained my husband when I don’t feel like cooking, and he isn’t stepping up to the kitchen counter. I grab my nut bin and say, “I don’t feel like cooking – I’m having nuts for dinner! Fend for yourself!” He doesn’t argue and has free reign to eat a box of Kraft mac & cheese or eat junk food. I don’t care!!!

5th Respondent:

1 – tired

2 – a. menstrual cycles and everything related to them

b. having to exist in late-stage capitalism and patriarchy

"I have power...I have No Power....I have power...I have No Power!!!

Women often say in response to, “How ya doin?” with, “I’m tired.” When I’m asked that question – I typically answer honestly – and tired is a frequent reply. It is exhausting being a woman and human being. For example, having lots of power and NO Power is debilitating! Women are machines of unlimited power – bearing and raising children, working, cleaning, shopping, cooking, planning, catering and being sexy for their partner (or not), etc. etc. The daily list/grind is endless. Like our equine friends – we are workhorses, racehorses, packhorses, warhorses, mounts, chargers and when we have to be - nags. No wonder we are all exhausted – being a horse is haaaarrrrd!

“Menstrual cycles and everything related to them” is every girl/woman’s bane. No wonder they called it “The Curse!” Negative connotation for a natural physiological function – but biblical in its implications. Like cramps – we all struggle through this monthly female affliction – but we carry on because we are stronger than our tribulations. Once again, sorry about the follow up to menses, which is – The Menopause.

“Having to exist in late-stage capitalism and patriarchy” – this menace is a much larger topic and deserves its own blog. Women are often relegated to powerless oppressed positions and enduring capitalism and patriarchy on top of what we normally deal with day to day – is almost too much to bear. I'm raging and depressed as I write this! Tolerance is not an option. I personally will never bend the knee – but fully expect to pay for the repercussions. So, have a good sobbing purge! Dab those eyes. Wipe that snot. Stand tall. Suck that core in, and scream, “I’m mad as hell, and I’m not going to take this Capitalism and Patriarchy Shit anymore!!”

Don't F**k with me.....I'm a woman on the edge!!

6th Respondent:

1 – strength

2 – a. not being taken seriously

b. your value shouldn’t be aligned with your relationship to a man (daughter, wife, sister, mother)

I'm going to "Warrior Pose" my way to gender equality!!

Strength is mentioned a few times – symbolical and synonymous when defining the word – Woman. Our strength(s) have no bounds. Mothers protecting their children, women leaving an abusive relationship or job, women supporting other women, etc. etc. I could go on and on with examples of how strong we are – but we already know that. We are all Mama Grizzlies when it comes to others – and we bite! I want to see the day when every woman on the planet rises up and makes a gender stand for equality. What a beautiful and powerful image!

Not being taken seriously happens more often than others (men) can imagine. I talk a lot about my formative years and being called silly, inane and gullible. It got a smidge better as I’ve passed the mid-century mark – but still happens. I’ll include some “dishonorable mentions” of male reactions to something I’ve suggested or said during my adult years and will never forget (or forgive).

“You’re being ridiculous!”

“What’s wrong with you?”

“You’re over-reacting.”

"You're hysterical!"

"Calm down."

“Hmmmm…. No, that would never work.”

“zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.” Yes, on quite a few occasions, the male I was speaking to fell asleep during our conversation. Alerted by the snoring mid-sentence – I sat there, shifted gears, stared at him with cold dead eyes and started planning his demise or grab a sharpie and draw a penis on his face! Thank god women are strong – because I prevented myself from poisoning his much needed coffee!!

This lack of respect and assumptive attitude that we are not important enough to listen to or be taken seriously is getting real tired. Wake up guys!!

This segues perfectly with the 2nd pet peeve - your value shouldn’t be aligned with your relationship to a man. I saw this a lot growing up in the 60’s/70’s. “Wives should be barefoot and pregnant – in the kitchen” or “wives should be seen and not heard” - was the male anthem. Apparently, it still is to some extent. I’ve heard recently that there is a generation of young males in the US that believe these ancient cliches should be re-established as the norm in our society. This terrifies me! What century do we live in? What’s next – cave man mentality? What segment of women are teaching this heresy? Obviously, silent wives who are barefoot and pregnant – in the kitchen!!! Shame on you! 

7th Respondent:

1 – strong

2 – a. assumption that a woman is moody/unpredictable

b. still a world of the glass ceiling

There’s that word again – strong! Just add that to your resume or CV!!

OMG – “assumption that a woman is moody/unpredictable” – irritates the snot out of me. How many times have you heard, “She must be on her period!!” It’s as if those two words – moody/unpredictable – are associated only with the female race. Ironically, I have close family, friends and acquaintances of the male persuasion that are incredibly moody and unpredictable!!! Some are downright terrifying! This is just another passive aggressive and weak excuse men tell themselves to feel better about themselves!

“The glass ceiling” unfortunately still exists in 2024. The unspoken but acknowledged barrier that prevents women (and minorities) from advancements in our professions – maintains to this day. Rising above a certain level of hierarchy is almost impossible unless you dispose of your male competition – by lying, cheating and stealing - like they do. If you can’t kill them, join them? Stooping to their level is beneath us - because we are better people!

8th Respondent:

1 – fierce, courageous, beautiful, loving

2 – a. hormones b. mansplaining

Let’s break this one down:

a.     Fierce – not the first thing we usually resort to – but if pushed to the edge – we will fight to the death. We also have a ferocious need to protect our loved ones. 

b.    Courageous – we have no choice but have courage – because we are our own champions. Pick your battles wisely.

c.     Beautiful – it’s nice to have a pleasant exterior – but real beauty comes from within. Light the world with your fierce soul!

d.    Loving – our love fills the void that binds.

Here’s an excerpt from my book on the first pet peeve topic, aptly titled: 

Hormones

“or lack thereof . . . 

My husband calls them, “Whore Moans!” What does that mean? No Money—No Workey? Hmmm . . . 

Whore Moans!

Without balanced hormones—we are just hairy eunuchs with sagging boobs and an attitude.

Progesterone and Estrogen—where did they go? Did our biological clock run out of batteries? Did my ability to procreate and enjoy sex expire? Fuck, Yeah!

This mysterious female hormonal necessity seems to evaporate overnight. I didn’t realize how much I missed hormones until they were gone. This metamorphosis, from youth to decline, is the impetus which leads us to everything in this menopausal memoir.

Hormones helped rein in the crazy, maintained a taut skin suit and occasionally made me horny. I’ve now lost the ability to care.

Apparently, there are drugs and treatments you can take to get your life back—only to cut it short because the drugs can kill you! I recommend talking to a professional.

Menopause is a parasite that catapults us into a chemical body and mind take-over. The ongoing plight of female aging begins with menopause!”

Here’s a quote from my blog that humorously conveys one of my personal pet peeves and this respondent as well - mansplaining:

Quote from – How to Communicate with Your Primate. Deciphering the Chatter!

“10.  How to Stop Your Primate from “Ape-splaining!” – This is an almost incurable disease and will be my hurdle to overcome for the rest of my life. You must remind yourself that they believe with every hair-follicle of their being, that they are the smartest primate in the room. Often, they are right – but not always. One of my favorite self-quotes is, “Just because you’re educated, doesn’t mean you’re smart!!” I came up with this nugget due to all the “Ape-splaining” I’ve had to endure for 65 years!!! If I’m wrong or need help with something – I am the first one to admit defeat. But male primates will never relinquish their smart status. It can be mind-bendingly irritating – but since creation – it is their nature. Women's burden to bare!! BTW - If I want to bring my primate down a peg or two - I ask him how to spell a word. His eyes glaze over and he starts trying to spell it under his breath, sometimes using fingers like he's counting - only to admit he doesn't know how to spell "hirsute" and knuckles off to play with his tools. Small but gratifying victory. 

The best way to deal with this? Don’t argue with Captain Obvious. Don’t waste your energy because they refuse to lose this game of intellect. I recommend you let them primate-ificate until they run out of steam. Nod occasionally, but once again, don’t commit. Once they feel safe that you’re convinced of their “Superior Primate Brain Dominance” – you are free to do whatever you want – because they have short attention spans. If it’s a major decision that affects you both – do your homework and spreadsheet them to death. Excel is your strategic line of defense. Primates don’t know how to type."

9th Respondent:

1 – strong and nurturer

2 – a. being dismissed (not feeling seen or heard)

b. chauvinism (did I really just use that word in the year 2024??!!)

Yes, strong and nurturer. This common thread should hit home by now on how much strength and compassion and love we have in our hearts and souls to nurture those around us. Once again, I’m proud and humbled to belong to this sisterhood.

“Being dismissed – not feeling seen or heard” – is an ongoing theme in my book and blogs. It’s an extension of so many of the pet peeves listed. 

I wrote about feeling dismissed  – under extenuating circumstances – in my blog – quote below: Our Bodies, Our Minds, Ourselves..Invisibility is my Superpower!

“Invisibility is my Superpower!!! In my later years, I’ve met people on the sidewalk that make me jump out of their way – as if I’m incorporeal. This happens more often as you age. For example: I was standing in line at a Macy’s (the slowest check out in the world!) and an older white man cuts in front of me. The female snails-clerk (yes I meant to spell it that way) acted as if this is normal and waits on him. She completely ignored the fact that myself and the woman behind me had been standing there for 20 mins. So I loudly said, “WOW! I’m Invisible!! Fantastic!!! I have a Super Power!!!!!" The rude guy turned and looked down his nose at me with mild disdain and probably wondered who was talking – because I’m invisible. The snails-clerk just sniffed in a huff because it made her feel important. The woman behind me burst out laughing – because she was also invisible but could see me! We laughed and talked about how discourteous people can be and how slow Macy’s checkout is. The moral of this story is that invisibility is stronger in numbers.

I use the term "invisibility" because it not only alludes to being treated like you are, in reality, invisible, but also includes those who treat you like your whole existence can be disregarded because they deem you invisible. Taking away all your power and self-worth in a couple of words or actions. Well, I know what I’d do if I was invisible and these self-important, ignorant people would not be happy about it! “Pantsing” a narcissist is always funny! Invisibility can also be helpful in a Zombie Apocalypse!!”

In my book I mention being dismissed/not seen/not heard and one of my responses to the person denigrating me was, “Don’t F**k with me, (name here)! I’m a woman on the edge!” He certainly heard and saw me – as did everyone else. I felt fantastic afterwards!

Sometimes wearing a clown costume helps and often terrifying!!

BTW – chauvinism exists in 2024. This f**king superiority complex is pissing me off! Remember the book, “The Scarlet Letter?” How about we make every chauvinist wear a huge C with the image of a pig in the center on his chest. It might not cure them of this over-inflated mental illness – but it would make women happy!!

10th Respondent:

1 – mature female

2 – a. we are weak and need a man to take care of us

b. men continue to be promoted more in business               

Mature female is apt – because women are usually the grownup in any room! 

There is nothing weak about women – especially if we are fully realized and believe in ourselves. Another topic covered in my Primates Blogs. Men want us to be the weaker sex so they can primp and preen in front of all the other apes in their social structure and prove their superiority while beating their chests with testosterone-induced pride! Just read, “Lord of the Flies” – which gives you a glimpse into a society without women and their disastrous attempts at governing themselves. 

Like the “glass ceiling” peeve above – men will “continue to be promoted more in business” until the world comes to its senses. Don’t hold your breath – but I still live with hope in my heart!

11th Respondent:

1 – the word woman makes me think – strong, intuitive and empathetic

2 – a pet peeve is the way women are treated in the medical system. Everything is dismissed as either anxiety or the need to lose weight

The word strong again. I loved her descriptors – intuitive and empathetic. You could even say that women are intuitively empathetic. I believe most women innately feel and see things on a visceral level that the male gender lacks. And if you truly listen to your gut and trust your instincts – then empathy would naturally comingle with intuition. 

I also need to point out the lack of empathy in our world and has been for centuries. This word needs its own blog. There should be a class taught in our formative years – in every school - the meaning of empathy. Think about it!

I thought the first pet peeve was a very interesting concern. She is right when it comes to women’s medical issues and how we are treated by the medical community. 

As I’ve aged, the pat answer to any of my fears and issues has been, “You’re getting Old or You have OLS – Old Lady Syndrome!” It’s insulting to me, my intelligence and my bodily concerns. Menopause is a perfect example. Please read my book! Also, I’ve written 2 blogs about my medical appointments and analyses – “You’re Getting Old” and “Battle Scars of an Aging Woman” – plus many more blogs about what it’s like being a woman! 

I know that we’ve progressed since the “women having the vapors” stage – but not far enough! And she’s right when she says, “Everything is dismissed as either anxiety or the need to lose weight.” OMG! How many doctors have dismissed women because they think they are being hysterical or overly anxious! And when are they going to stop body-shaming everyone who isn’t a size 0. 

12th Respondent:

1 – strong and mother

2 – a. accommodating others

b. waiting

“Strong and mother!” I wrote a blog about my mother – and the strength it took to raise 5 kids when she was a child herself. Women must be strong. Look at all that we endure – but we keep going. Because we are strong! Look at all the respondent answers above. 

“Accommodating others” seems to be a persistent issue in a lot of women’s lives – as if your needs and desires are not as important as theirs. When I talk with female family and friends – this is an ongoing conversation – that never gets resolved. Because that would mean that all the people being accommodated would have to be accommodating in kind to the person accommodating them! Sort of an oxymoron! Because women accommodate more than others – we are also being taken advantage of and taken for granted. It’s a vicious cycle. If you stop accommodating – then you are considered rude or uncaring. If you point out that you feel taken for granted – then you sound like a whining petulant bitch-child. There’s no win-win. I think the only solution is cutting the umbilical cord of life and just say NO. Sometimes that one word can be power!

Meditating on the word - No!

“Waiting” peeve cracked me up. My first husband loved to make me wait. I am always on time or more often - early. I love to get to the airport 2-3 hours before boarding – because the alternative makes me physically ill. So, for 5 years I was vomiting anxiety daily. Not all “late” people are passive aggressive – but I seem to be a PA magnet. They are parasitic in nature and thrive on other people’s stress, fears and pain. I think that white lies can be beneficial in this particular case. Pad the time in your favor when planning – so you can relax while they freak out about being early!

Before I tell you my survey responses – I want all of you to go to Barbra Streisand’s link and read her famous speech from 1992. It is worth the read!

http://barbra-archives.com/bjs_library/90s/elle-women-speech.html

It's my turn to weigh in on my survey on - What Does the Word Woman Mean?

1 – superhero and empathy - our superpowers! 

What are my 2 Pet Peeves about being a Woman? I have a few!!

2 – passive aggressive men/people, mansplaining, condescension, being ignored, given advice when I didn’t ask for it, correcting me when I’m NOT WRONG but refusing to admit I was RIGHT

I’ve already expounded on most of these peeves and woman descriptors. From the bottom of my heart – I believe - “Every woman in this universe is a Super Hero!

WE ARE ALL SUPER HEROES!!!

Women - the Super-ior Race!

What’s it like being a woman? It’s tough as shit!

Did you notice that no one mentioned the words "feminine" or "sex kitten" - because those would have been brought up in a Male Survey!

We are the world’s empaths! Without empathy our world would die!

So don’t be a hermit crab, like your aging bellybutton, gather your female compatriots and storm every castle you encounter!

Find your voice!! You are not invisible! I hear you! I see you!!!

If you want even more info on life, menopause, aging and other fun observations – not only check out my book but I have 33 blogs that go into all sorts of funny and informative crap about being a woman of many years, experiences and observations . My doctor appointment and middle child blogs are a hoot!! It’s better to educate with honesty, horror, humility and humor than remain silent. 

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I would really appreciate some reviews. Amazon takes them VERY SERIOUSLY and it really helps my ranking, relevancy, algorithm and ego.

Please help spread the word that my book is available on Amazon - Menopause the Horror, Humility, and Humor of It All!

Thanks again for your support and encouragement. I am so humbled by your kindness. You are forever my Super Hero’s!!!

Remember – Women Ignite and Women Unite! 

Thanks for taking the time to read my book and my blog. Tell all your social media friends, family, marginalized women, superheroes and followers.

Let’s be Friends!!

Colleen McIntosh